Sunday, May 15, 2011

Moving

Dear all,
I've been away for some time and APOLOGIES!!! I guess working, taking care of Adele and trying to keep up with the madness of living in the city caught up me.

Now, I am VERY pregnant, with only a couple months left until another little one joins our family. I am finishing off the year, completely uncomfortable, but marveling in the fact that it is spring here! I love the city when the cherry blossoms are in bloom, it's not a sweltering 90 degrees with humidity or 15 degrees with snow. I love that inbetween stage called spring.

I have a ton of friends/family who are having babies this year....It seems to be a fruitful time for the year of the rabbit. Go rabbits! My sister is having her first, two of my best friends just gave birth, and there are countless others. I feel as though spring brings out all the pregnant ladies that are hibernating in NYC winter.

My husband has the opportunity to switch jobs, a smart move for his career, but it would mean us relocating to SOUTH CAROLINA!!!!! Ah! I always thought our next move would be to California, where I'm from, or Europe, where I would like to spend more time. It's such a good opportunity for him, and he's sacrificed for much for our family, that I feel obligated to go. I guess I never truly realized how much a I prize my independence and how reluctant I am to let go of a field that has been truly rewarding. I love my job. I love working with kids and helping their families navigate the crazy world we call education.

I can't help but wonder if I am making a huge mistake if I move and leave all my career connections here. I am hesitant to supplant myself and my family in a foreign community at a time when we are adjusting to a new baby.

If I really face the music, I know that part of my fear stems from my pride, my ridiculous belief that I can do it all. If I am truly honest, I have to admit that the last two years of working and juggling taking care of Adele has been difficult. I am constantly feeling torn between the two and I can't imagine what it will be like with a third.

That said, it's still hard to give up what you know, what's familiar and routine for you.

We're still negotiating terms and we still need to fly out to see if I can imagine myself living there. It's a huge change, but I am thankful for the possibility even if we end up turning it down. Here's to a very eventful year, full of crying babies and imminent change!